Imagine yourself in a crowded airport. You’re waiting for your plane an now faced with missing your connection. This is a truly stressful event for even the calmest of us. So the question is, What is your self-talk in this situation?

    Having been there himself, Tom Whiteman knows that for him there is the initial anxiety “What am I going to do? Is there another flight I can take? Can I still make my connection?”

    This anxiety is a normal part of being human. But once Tom determines that he’s going to miss his connection and there’s no other flight, then he usually beings the process of changing his self-talk. He forces himself to do this, actually rehearsing his self-talk as follows: “There’s nothing I can do. I’ll just relax and make the most of the time. Things could be much worse; at least I’m safe.”

“He’s got a lot of nerve. He doesn’t have any idea what kind of night I’ve had!”

    Tom hasn’t always been good at this. God taught him a powerful lesson one weekend when he was traveling. He had missed a flight, was rerouted through two other cities, and spend all night trying to get home—normally it would have been just a two hour flight. He arrived home about six o’clock Sunday morning in the foulest of moods. He had told off three flight attendants, had several very nasty conversations with God, and when he walked in the door of his home he proclaimed to his wife, “Don’t expect me to go to church with you this morning!” (as if it were her fault). He was just dozing off when the phone rang. It was about seven o’clock in the morning. You can probably imagine his reaction: “Who in the world is calling me at this time in the morning! Why can’t I get some sleep around here?”

    The man on the phone was the Sunday school teacher for the couples class Tom and his wife attended. He was calling to ask Tom to teach the class for him that morning. Tom immediately thought, “He’s got a lot of nerve. He doesn’t have any idea what kind of night I’ve had!” But before Tom could respond, the man continued, giving the reason for his request. “Our son was killed last night by a drunk driver.”

    Suddenly everything changed. After agreeing to do whatever he could to help, Tom hung up the phone and had a whole new conversation with God. “Be with this family…and thank you for getting me home safely.” That night was several years ago, and yet its impact has changed every trip and inconvenience Tom has had since then. He’s changed his self-talk. He’s redefined “a bad night,” and he’s tried to stop worrying about things that really aren’t that bad.

HEARTLIGHT(R) Magazine is a ministry of loving Christians and the Westover Hills church of Christ.
Edited by Phil Ware and Paul Lee.
Copyright © 1996-97, Heartlight, Inc., 8332 Mesa Drive, Austin, TX 78759.
The preceding was taken from the book, Stress Management by Dr. Thomas Whiteman, Dr. Sam Verghese, and Randy Petersen (Zondervan, 1996), available at bookstores or by calling 800-727-3480. Used by permission.
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