“Lord,” Martha said to Jesus, “if you had been here, my brother would not have died. But I know that even now God will give you whatever you ask.”

…

Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me will live, even though they die; and whoever lives by believing in me will never die. Do you believe this?” (John 11:21-22, 25-26).

I’ve been where Martha was. Have you? I have also said to Jesus through angry and desperate tears: “Lord, if you had been here, my father would not have died! Lord, where were you in our time of need? Why did you not hear our prayers? Why did you let this happen? Why did a good man, a godly man, my daddy, have to wither away over 10 years and die at such an early age leaving my mom a widow and my brothers and me fatherless?”

My frustration, hurt, and doubt in that moment didn’t manifest in Martha’s faith-borne expectation: “But I know that even now God will give you whatever you ask.”

In the moment, I’m not sure I trusted the Lord’s own words:

I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me will live, even though they die; and whoever lives by believing in me will never die. Do you believe this?

My response, at first, was, “I doubt it!”

I knew my father had died. I knew he wasn’t coming back to me. I knew he wouldn’t be around to watch his grandchildren grow up or get to meet his great grandchildren. Then, with a simple request, I was forced into a decision about my faith. Dad’s preacher, my mentor, Lynn asked, “Do you want to say any words about your daddy at the graveside?”

My instinctive response was immediate: “I don’t think so!” As I chewed on the question, I realized that as a minister I was going to stand in front of many other gaping holes in the ground. I would find myself with many other people mourning someone they loved. These people would have a gaping hole in their hearts just as I did in my grief. If I was going to help them find comfort and hope in their grief, I had to decide what I really believed about Jesus’ power over death in my own grief. I needed to own my faith in the face of my dad’s death. If I couldn’t find hope in Jesus in the face of my dad’s death, then I had no integrity helping others find hope in Jesus as they grieved similar losses.

I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me will live, even though they die; and whoever lives by believing in me will never die. Do you believe this?

Jesus was asking me to decide. He was challenging me to believe or to step aside.

As the funeral coach pulled up to the graveside, I stood with my mom and watched friends carry my dad’s body to that hole in the ground. Something in my heart stirred. Jesus’ presence was tangibly real. His comfort through the Holy Spirit was real. Faith warmed my broken heart. This faith wasn’t a desperate move in the face of loss. It was a genuine move of deep conviction filled with assurance and empowered by confident hope.

“Yes, Lord, I believe! I believe you raised the daughter of Jairus. I believe you raised Lazarus. I believe you rose from death and conquered sin, death, and hell. Yes, Lord, I believe the dead will hear your voice and you will raise the faithful to life with you on your return. Yes, Lord Jesus, I believe!”

I let Lynn know that I did want to say something at that graveside — that I believed because of Jesus’ power over death I would see my daddy again. So, through tears of hope I read a passage I have read at many other gravesides over the last three decades:

Our lives, our futures, our forevers, are secure in his nail-scarred but victorious hands.
Brothers and sisters, we do not want you to be uninformed about those who sleep in death, so that you do not grieve like the rest of mankind, who have no hope. For we believe that Jesus died and rose again, and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him. According to the Lord’s word, we tell you that we who are still alive, who are left until the coming of the Lord, will certainly not precede those who have fallen asleep. For the Lord himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And so we will be with the Lord forever. Therefore encourage one another with these words (1 Thessalonians 4:13-18).

Since they placed my dad’s body in that hole in the ground, my faith in Jesus’ promise to conquer death has not wavered. While I know my body will one day fail me, I believe my life is in Jesus’ hands (Colossians 3:1-4), and I will never be separated from him (Romans 8:32-39). I believe that when I die, I will be with Jesus (Philippians 1:19-24) awaiting the time that he returns and raises me to give me a new body and reunion with those who love the Lord.

Death still hurts. It still separates us from those we love, no matter how temporary that separation may be. But, death cannot hold us, and the grave cannot keep us because we belong to Jesus. Our lives, our futures, our forevers, are secure in his nail-scarred but victorious hands.

Jesus comes to you in this moment, and he repeats the words he said to Martha and asks, “ Do you believe this?”

I am praying you can say, “Yes, Lord Jesus, I believe!” even if you have to add, “but help my unbelief.”

Special thanks for the use of images related to Jesus' ministry from The Lumo Project and Free Bible Images.